Cheerful Curmudgeon

For better or worse, writing continues… Perhaps Twitter has it only partly right. Perhaps instead of 140 characters, we need to be limited to six words.

“ARTHUR JOSEPH!” I’m in big trouble.

Rejected by NaNoWriMo. Not novel enough.

Morning walk. Trees rustle. World sparkles.

I read another story. Friends groan.

My friend, Scott, is writing a novel. I’m just like him except I lack the talent, time, and patience to write a novel. But disregarding those tiny hindrances, I’m going to write a novel one of these days, too. Until then, I continue to offer my short short short stories for your gentle amusement:

Run done. Quick cold shower invigorates.

Sliver of soap; too many showers.

Fur in cereal. My cat purrs.

Toaster fixed. I plugged it in.

Being undiagnosed ADHD (who has the time or attention span to get properly diagnosed?), I am fascinated with the ultimate in concise literary expression: the six word story. My wife may be distressed at my latest obsession but, hapless you, I share a few of my more precious gems here:

Face down on keyboard: Monday morning.

Computer beeps. Mouse flies at screen.

Look out! Probably more to come.

Jugglers make it look so easy…

I am so happy. Netflix will finally stream movies to the Sony Playstation PS3. We have a Roku player, too, but it will be more convenient to have all of our entertainment stuff in one box. And the PS3 ought to produce a better picture, too.

My deepest appreciation to ThinkGeek for making me feel old first thing in the morning. They have recreated the “classic student slide rule” and are hawking them for a pittance of what this paragon of useful technology is worth.

ThinkGeek Slide Rule

The sad thing is… not only do I remember slide rules, I depended on them to get my physics homework done in high school. Not only do I remember slide rules, those of us who used them were faster than the folks with Bowmar Brain calculators.

I did succumb to the glitter and glitz of calculators and computers, becoming an RPN bigot as any newly minted geek was in the 1970s. (Good thing, too. Have you ever tried to blog on a slide rule?)

Slide rules re-entered my life in 1986 when I took flying lessons. The E6B flight computer is little more than a circular slide rule with  special scales for doing some temperature calculations and a special rotating, clear window on the back for solving wind triangle problems. Spock recognized the utility of the E6B, too, using it on the bridge of the Enterprise in Who Mourns for Adonis.

Spock using an E6B Flight Computer

I ended up with two slide rules, my own and my grandfather’s (and my E6B flight computer). My slide rule evaporated years ago but my grandfather’s is still in the basement. And you know what, it still works… no batteries required.

My (Grandfather's) Slide Rule

My good friend Bert just purchased a farm in Enville, TN and opened his blog, Farmer Bert. I have always been a bit concerned about Bert’s, er, stability (he is my friend, after all) and his first blog posting, Twisted Reason I want to be a Farmer has certainly done nothing to alay my fears. I’m not sure if the video is live sculpture or sheep dance but whatever else it is, it is undoubtedly the most original use of sheep that I have ever seen… and never imagined. Head on over to Farmer Bert’s site and watch the video. It is safe for work unless your cube-mates object to loud laughter!

On a gorgeous spring afternoon, Becky and Derek and Cindy and Geoff came over for dinner and entertainment. Unbeknownst to them, the entertainment was a new copy of BUZZ! Quiz TV for our PS3. The preview video looks hokey but the game is amazingly fun and goofy. Sony hit a wonderful balance between insulting and funny that had us all practically rolling on the floor the whole evening.

Up to four people (or teams) can play at the same time. The game comes with four special wireless controllers, each with a large, red buzz button and four smaller, color coded buttons for answering multiple choice questions. Just add batteries.

You can pick your character (that’s me, on the left) and the sound of your buzzer (I’m partial to the train whistle). Then gameshow host Buzz orchestrates the whole thing in purely delightful manner. You don’t want to be low man on the point totem pole unless you relish Buzz’s attention. With 5,000 questions, and tens of thousands of user-contributed on-line quizzes, there is plenty of bafflement for all ages and plenty of chances for everybody to show off. Derek, though, was the big winner, going home undefeated (just barely); I’ll get him next time, I’m sure!

I have even created a few quizes of my own. You can try them online, even if you do not have a PS3. Trust me, though, it’s much more fun with all of the nuttiness of the game than just answering the questions in your web browser.

Some videos just should not be made. But once they are, you just cannot get that darned theme music out of your head. Do you remember the MacGyver TV show? Watch this if you dare:

My stepfather is clearing out things he does not want any longer so about 25 of my old friends moved in last week, including these vintage Peanuts books: